Niagara Gazette


April 13, 2013

LETTERS FROM THE ISLAND: Writing on a few recent wrongs

Niagara Gazette — Dear Mainland Nit-Pickers — President Calvin Coolidge once observed that “All I know is what I read in the newspapers.” Were he reading this column, a lot of the things he’d know wouldn’t be true. Recent weeks we’ve provided full employment for fact-checkers. For example:


BOWING TO “FIDDLER” — We shorted the reservation number for the Parish Players’ “Fiddler on the Roof.” It resumes Sunday at 2 p.m. at St. Stephen Church, after a night off for Confirmations (what, no bar mitzvahs?) and continues next Thursday through Saturday. One of Doug’s first bosses (1948, yes, we had telephones then) forbade the publication of phone numbers for this very reason. We didn’t get it exactly wrong, we just didn’t get enough of it, omitting a digit, so at least nobody was bothered with wrong-number calls. It’s 465-5574, that is, four, six, five, five, five (three of ‘em), seven, four.

The good news is that we get to mention this admirable enterprise one more time. Mazel tov.


ROUND THE BEND — Supervisor Mary Cooke gently reminds Doug that the Curves salon next to Say Cheese Pizza went straight a long time ago and is located elsewhere. This history-as-truth appeared in a report on the parking-lot feud between Say Cheese and 7-11. The “spite fence” remains in place, withstanding assaults from wind and careless drivers.


ROUND THE BEND, LAP 2 — We have insulted our little roundabout ever since it was in the design stage, but Doug has to admit it works pretty well. He no longer avoids this intersection, which was once “controlled” by a traffic light in the same way that a knot controls a shoelace. However, the presence last Sunday afternoon of young evangelists waving Bibles and placards at every entranceway did neither the traffic flow nor their cause any favors. It was downright dangerous. While eager to meet our maker, we can wait awhile.

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  • NIA Confer, Bob mug new CONFER: It's time the U.S. stopped giving aid to Israel When you see some of the atrocities that Israel has committed in Gaza, including last week's bombing of a United Nations school that was being used as a civilian emergency shelter, you should really wonder why we count them as an ally and why we devote so much of our financial and political resources to the scoundrels.

    July 29, 2014 1 Photo

  • NIA Higgs, Norma mug HIGGS: A cupcake gets the Niagara Beautification Commission spotlight Not a cupcake per se, but a cute shop in LaSalle operated by a "sweet" lady who is a real dynamo when it comes to running a business.

    July 28, 2014 1 Photo

  • NIA Glynn, Don mug [Duplicate] GLYNN: A key factor in luring the convention A natural wonder in the nation's oldest state park isn't the lone factor for selecting Niagara Falls as a convention site.

    July 27, 2014 1 Photo

  • SINGER: Regional poetry and sad realities If that isn't (or wasn't) poetry, I don't know what is! I'm referring to the self-satisfied, sluggish trot of ice chunks emanating from Lake Erie in early May 2014 -- sauntering, it felt, along the lovely Niagara.

    July 27, 2014

  • NIA Smith, Doug and Polly LETTERS FROM THE ISLAND: Quest for an appointment comes up short We're rolling up our sleeves for Quest. The Big Mac of blood tests, the Tops of tourniquets, the Sears of screenings, opens on our Island at Monday's crack of dawn.

    July 26, 2014 1 Photo

  • NIA Davis, Vincent mug VINCENT DAVIS: Pledge your allegiance to the Slurpee, America's treat By now you must be aware that it is, in fact, summer. And since summer is a season not characterized by any obvious weather events (sometimes it's hot for days in a row, sometimes you get a bunch of rainy days and chilly nights) but instead activities, I'd like to bring attention to an underrated staple of summer sun enjoyment: Consuming the brain freeze-inducing snack classic, the Slurpee.

    July 26, 2014 1 Photo

  • NIA Hamilton, Ken mug HAMILTON: Popeye's '7-Minute' guide to educating southerners -- and me! Writer Mark Twain said that when he 14, his father was so ignorant that he could hardly stand to have the old man around. But upon turning 21, Twain said that he was astonished by how much his father had learned in just seven years.

    July 25, 2014 1 Photo

  • NIA DeLuca, Michele mug DELUCA: Wegmans call warns of bad fruit I was humming to myself the other day, getting ready for work on a lovely summer morning, when I decided to check my messages on the house phone. I hit the play button and heard a message from Wegmans warning me about some fruit that I had bought at their store. As quick as that, a message with the scary potential to change my life or the life of someone I love.

    July 24, 2014 1 Photo

  • NIA Glynn, Don mug GLYNN: Ortt jumps on drive to repeal the SAFE Act It was a no-brainer for North Tonawanda Mayor Rob Ortt, a Republican candidate for the 62nd Senate District seat, to join the forces to repeal the state's SAFE Act.

    July 24, 2014 1 Photo

  • Verplank: Turn back the clock at the Porter Cup

    July 24, 2014

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