Niagara Gazette — Representing NITEOWL was traffic attorney Reed Ikulous (best known for his ads: “Hurt on a Bus? Call Reed Ikulous, 999-9999”). He pleaded that in any road closures, “the constitutionally-guaranteed right to work nights is overlooked,” and that late-shifters suffer “emotional pain and suffering” from being stuck in traffic at the expense of day-shifters.
Judge Brad Lee Dunn ruled in NITEOWL’s favor, but only proportionately. “Inasmuch as night-shifters comprise about 15 per cent of the population, I think it’s fair to open the bridge for them 15 percent of the time, which would be one day out of seven,” he said.
Monday’s will be the first day-shift closure, with one-way traffic on the bridge from 6 a.m. to 8 p.m., much to the dismay of Dyngus Day celebrants coming to and from Stan’s Polish Nook. Pleas for a “pussy-willow pass” were doused.
Other daytime closures will be announced “usually the day before,” the judge ruled.
He urged travelers to check their calendars — beginning with Monday’s date.
Come visit. Monday even. No foolin.’Polly and Doug E-mail email@example.com